"Emptiness isn't loneliness, it's the missing of you."

My my...how long has it been...2day is 26 so it is the last day of school a month ago..i've miss the time to spend with you, to look at you, to admire you, to talk to you...

My god, you will never know that i've kept this for a year now...its nearly a year now that i've kept quiet... if only time can stood a still... i would want to treasure it till now...

Every morning, its like a new day. i would embrace myself to see you... all i ever do is just wanting to look at your smile...to see you happy is a must...

Once, you were different, it has reached its climax...i'm worried...It doesn't matter to me if you're in love with the other guy...as long as you're happy, i too will be happy...

I remebered trying to buy something to make you happy, but will it do...

Some might has guessed my feelings, some might even know...some got it totally wrong... why can't i tell them the truth...is it that i'm afraid of the fact that my chance is like hope on a dangling string...

Being obvious that i love her, i never showed that because i knew you already had a deep stab in the heart recently that time...you might be looking at me but i will never look at you...i did it purposely so as to not to let anyone know...in actual fact, i did look at you when i've got the chance...

Is being different is all about us not being able to be together... i knew i had no chance at all...i hate that...i hate to feel that, i hate myself...should i try, will she know?..

Last day of school, i try to spend some time with you...i know its difficult 4 me to had all this but it might be the last time we meet....indeed is is the truth...till today, we had not even meet...nor even see...after the o's...sms? okay it is at least something...but i don't feel its enough...

That very same night of the last day of school, i remembered looking at her photos...i ask why?...why must it be now that i hold regrets....i failed to hold on my tears...triggered tears gland but what for?... other guys are going for her and she could be as well with them..rather than me, the ugly one...

if you wanna knoe, she's is such a beauty...she is just those rare, unique with perfect personalities to me...and till today, i dunno why i fall in love with her...

if i were to be with her...she's the beauty and i'm the beast...i hate myself...i'm ugly and useless...

Now all i ever do is being worried how she is?...is she fine?...if i know she fall sick, i went to pray to god..hoping for a cure...exams, let her have an easy time too...god,i let you decide my fate...

What's the point of living if i'm not happy at all....am i ever do everyday is to show everybody those smiles...i'm hurt miserably in the inside and no one knew...on the outside,is all just a lie...

i tried to move on, but i can't. i can't live without you...i am already findin a job and had the freedom to move around but its useless....i'm still unhappy without you...if you only you were here,...in my arms...

If you can give me just one chance, you know i love you, i love you all alone, i really miss you, i keep dreaming of you, i would stop breathing if i can't see you anymore.

Possible?...i know its impossible...

I'm left with two days...2 crucial days...

i miss you

i love you

i hate me

i'm sorry

being far away

is painful...

if only time can stood a stand still when i'm with you....